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Aug
17
Admin NNI
Women’s Day NNI – Consciousness Café
Dialogues
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This women’s day – Consciousness Café was fortunate to be invited into the Pretoria space through the Torralbas Burchell family. At the Open Warehouse, 2 men and several women chose the topic of “How do we (as women) take men along on the journey to a better society”
The topic was a heavy one; with a heavy gravity being felt in the room from the very beginning of the dialogue. Women expressed their frustration with a world that ignores their abilities; pays them less; and dismisses their emotions and opinions because they’re on their period or they are pmsing. Apart from the violence that patriarchy has made normal in women’s lives, the group was absorbed in a moment of the myriad of difficulties standing between a better society for all; both men and women.
Men became vulnerable and expressed the sheer fear they feel for what women are capable of, and the strength they show in dealing with emotions, and how women just do the very things men fail and are so challenged to do with such grace and finesse. We acknowledged the need for each other in a society filled with broken men; and even though we can call them trash, what next? How do we fix the next generation of men; most of all – is it our job as women to keep fixing when that’s all we’ve been doing?

The dialogue reached a pmore hopeful space when we realized our collective responsibility in changing the status quo. Men realized their responsibility in challenging male friends and family when they spoke out of turn and perpetuated patriarchy. Equally; women realized that as fatigued as they are, we still need to keep calling out injustice and addressing issues whenever we can.

It was an important and necessary conversation, and we were all lifted out of complacency and encouraged to keep up the good fight for women in our society

We ended off with a delicious hearty braai to feed the hungry but determined soul.

Aug
15
Admin NNI
NNI Diversity Dialogue on the 4th August
News
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What blocks progress?

The topic of “What blocks progress?” drew the most votes at our Diversity Dialogue on 4 August 2018 – “We have such potential as a country. Why are we stuck?” A long list of reasons was identified: Inequality & poverty, Labelling & discrimination, Poor leadership with no integrity, Broken people, families & communities, Fear, A culture of destruction & rage, Greed, Denialism, Right wingers, White supremacy, Patriarchy, Despondent & desperate youth … it seemed overwhelming – there was a general feeling of paralysis and fear in the room.

Anger moved us out of this trapped overwhelming feeling at the beginning of our time together and it became a lively dialogue … For more details follow the link http://tt-tt.co.za/blog/

 

Aug
15
Admin NNI
NNI Cape Town 4th August Dialogue
News
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On the 4th of August NNI Special Agents Roger and Dave, organised and facilitated an NNI in Cape Town. The chosen topic was “Providing a common space and place within and between communities/groups.:

“Dreams for this included: Empowerment, safety, being heard, respected, acknowledged, cared for valued, ability to overcome regrets, disappointments/past, children are educated understand what it is to be human beings, spark for connection is present, connecting with out human essence, freedom of choice to be the best you can be and want to be.

The initial voices were danger, ‘oversimplified boxes’, blame, fear, ‘guises and lies we tell ourselves’, stereotyping and shutdown. We then entered a deeper place of ‘helplessness’ and pride as barriers to such a desired place. Then there emerged the voice of “judgement dropped’, and empathy and choice. Each person provided personal actions and accountabilities to take forward.

Participants, 3 of whom were completely new to the NNI process, were appreciative of the opportunity to pause, dialogue and allow shifts to happen for them and in them. Each came away with definite actions and each remained open to the ongoing value and contribution that our transformational dialogue process can add for further human connection.”

Aug
15
Admin NNI
NNI Dialogue in Berlin on the 4th August
News
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NNI Agent Swaan facilitated an NNI in Berlin on the 4th August:
“The latest Berlin dialogue started out with democracy and extremism as a topic – and the dream revealed that in Berlin we already see much of what we would like to see in the rest of the world, namely diversity and respect for each other. The dialogue itself turned out to be an intensely emotional affair, with a focus on anger and feeling misunderstood, followed by the frustration of not knowing how to deal with it. Much intensive learning for all involved. More to follow!”

Aug
15
Admin NNI
NNI Berlin 1st August Dialogue
News
0

Our fantastic NNI Agent Wiebke facilitated a Berlin NNI on the 1st of August, on the topic of ‘(not) feeling loved’:
” When love spoke, it sounded quite heady and judgemental… “How things should be… ” & “If we acted out of love… “.
Love so wants to connect, but isn’t welcome everywhere and all the time. Especially if love wants to fix and heal things, but doesn’t listen.
True listening does not happen very often.
At end of NNI the group were all very connected, lying, sitting, messy, a bit of love everywhere, with lots of room to acknowledge and include sadness and pain.”

Jul
24
Admin NNI
NNI Berlin – July 21
News
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“On a hot summer weekend day, 8 brave people chose to stay for 5 hours in Dialogue.
The topic chosen was CONFLICT/FIGHT. What a courageous decision! It sounded like an important topic on many levels, both in personal relationships and also in the global theme of a politically divided society.
The dream looked alive and energetic, far from peaceful harmony. It was clear that once today’s conflict issues are resolved, we’ll actually be able to speak and disagree more openly, honestly and confidently. Clearly, our capacity to be with diversity would have grown enourmously.
What surfaced during the Dialogue were all the many ways how facing conflict is being avoided, and also the frustration and anger that comes with that. It was only when anger and well-educated were facing each other, and anger still wasn’t able to express and be heard, that all the pain that lives in well-educated became visible. Finally, a good amount of pain had a chance to be expressed and heard. We left the Dialogue with a sense of relief, love, connection, excitement, but also discomfort and more pain.
One of the golden learnings we heard is: When we allow anger to be expressed without being directed at someone, we do not know what will come out. Maybe pain.
In general, most of the learnings were about our ability/inability to express emotions and the cost of that. Also inquiries around: Are women more easily ready to express pain, while men are more easily able to express anger? What is our relationship with anger?
A hot spot arouse during the harvesting when a woman said the voice of power had transformed when it was inhabited by a woman and not a man. A lot of energy for another Dialogue…
I am so proud of this Dialogue group and the shift that happened. Thank you!” – NNI Agent
Wiebke

Jul
18
Admin NNI
“Fear is driving us apart- what is most needed right now?”
News
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NNI dialogue Cape Town 7 July:
“Fear is driving us apart- what is most needed right now?”

“What am I hearing about South Africa:

The dreams are real and vibrant, including: acceptance of the other; equal access to work, resources & opportunities; free as a bird, loving neighbour as oneself; justice; accountability; freedom of baggage (eg trauma); unity; we belong; love pulling together; acknowledging the other; see God in
everyone.

Yet the deep inequalities that exist continue feed the fears, and to cause polarisation,
separation, divisions, feelings of helplessness, anger, and despair that in turn engender distrust,
divisions, hatred, abuses, addictions and violence towards the other.” – Roger NNI Facilitator

Jun
25
Admin NNI
NNI CWD Dialogue 12 June 2018
News, NNI Tafelsig CWD Centre Dialogues
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On the 12th of June we held our fortnightly CWD NNI dialogue with the community of Tafelsig.
The topic was unemployment, something that affects the entire community.

” What I am hearing about SA: Poverty. An education that does not prepare young people. Complete loss of power when formal employment is not forthcoming.
What I saw at the end of the dialogue: 3 ladies energised the meeting like if the room was full. They were unstoppable. 
Actions: look for job.
Accountability: They mentioned the person who will keep them accountable but they will also meet to check how they are doing” – NNI Special Agent Sylvester

Jun
25
Admin NNI
Diversity Dialogues NNI June 2017
Dialogues, News
0

Diversity Dialogue is a team of brave and passionate NNI facilitators, taking NNI dialogue to their communities.

This was a private Diversity Dialogue at Arcadia Christian Church with more than 25 people. The topic “The Struggle with Identity because of the Past” was chosen. As each voice made an opening statement it was evident that many voices expressed fear underlying their main points of view. “Shame”, “Fear”, “Stereotypes” and “Anger” were the main contributors to the conversation. Out of the voice of “History not dealt with”, a “Longing for accountability for the past” from all sides, “Disillusionment with reconciliation”, but also a strong “Hope in a new identity in Christ” emerged. “Being judged”, “Inner Brokenness”, and “Distrust” tended to observe rather than participate in the conversation.

Struggling with Identity

Jun
25
Admin NNI
Diversity Dialogue’s NNI 2 June 2018
News
0

Diversity Dialogue is a team of brave and passionate NNI facilitators, taking NNI dialogue to their communities.

Our diversity dialogue on 2 June at Nokuphila was a small group but this lent itself to a more intimate conversation – the participants chose to dialogue about the challenge of family relationships. In a small group the question I sometimes ask myself as a facilitator is “Where is the diversity?” but we had exactly the diversity needed for the topic.

So many valuable insights were expressed … Keeping secrets from each other eats away at the individual secret-keeper as well as the relationship. Then it spills over into other relationships too. Secrecy spreads. A lack of trust and fear of rejection result in the wearing of masks even in close relationships. It is so easy to get into a rut of poor communication and takes a lot of personal work to change.

The importance of good communication was emphasized throughout the dialogue. A key to this was seen as the idea that “the problem” can be seen as separate from the individuals in the relationship. Instead of pointing fingers at each other in blame, they can together face the problem and make progress.

The Challenge of Family Relationships